Fifty Shades of Confused
Let me start this post by saying I haven’t read Fifty Shades of Grey. I have a to-be-read pile that’d make your head spin. (Being unable to read while I write helps that stack grow to insurmountable heights.) BUT even if I didn’t have a bookshelf full of “unreads”, I don’t think I’d give the novels a shot. Let me tell ya why.
1-People either love them or hate them. My beta-reader called me one day screaming about these books. “Move them up in line!” she said. “Read them before the others I gave you!” (Those “others” would be The DaVinci Code and Nora Robert’s Chesapeake Bay seres.) Yet, when I went to spin class last night, the entire class was hashing over their hate of the books. To my surprise, they didn’t *not* like them because they were “smut” (which I was totally expecting), but because they felt like they were waiting for something “magical” to happen. They were waiting for the plot to wrench directions. They were waiting to be excited in something other than the sex scenes. And that waiting never paid off. Being a plot-driven writer and reader, I simply don’t think it’d be my cup of tea.
2-I didn’t care much for The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty written by Anne Rice as A.N. Roquelaure, when she ventured into BDSM and hard core erotica. (Aside: Have you seen what the Shades Trilogy has done for those books? They were off-the-grid until the release. As of right now they’re #75 in erotica on Amazon and holding strong.) Although I like the dynamic of a knowledgeable, powerful hero bedding an innocent, gentle heroine (and teaching her things she didn’t realize she’d enjoy), it didn’t pay off for me when Anne Rice ventured there and she’s a wicked storyteller!
3-It’s fanfiction of Twilight. While I’m all for anything that gets someone writing and furthering the creative process, I’m personally not a fan of reading books based on other books. Well, okay, I *might* give Harry Potter fanfiction a shot. But Twilight? A book that didn’t really get my goat in the first place? It rubs me all shades of wrong. Heh.
4-I’m not up on trends. Ever. I didn’t like Uggs until they were fading out of style. (I still wear mine every winter.) I tend to dislike music until it’s “old” and off the radio. Hell, I couldn’t appreciate Metallica until twenty years later. I didn’t read Twilight until some of the buzz died down. And instead of letting myself get carried away in all the hype, I tend to be cynical, looking for ways it doesn’t measure up to the standard I’ve built in my head. No, I like figuring things out for myself. I like making my own decision about something being cute, or smooth-sounding, or good reading.
I may read Fifty Shades eventually. I may pick it up years down the road when no one is talking about it anymore. (Hunger Games is still on my shelf, waiting to be picked up.) But for now, I’ll settle for reading my “must reads”. (I’ve got Monica McCarty’s The Saint and Lauren Kate’s Rapture on my lap, *waiting* to be devoured!)
What about you? Did you read the books? Did you love them? Go on. Tell me what I’m mising out. Convince me I should read them. Or are you like me, leaving Shades on the shelf until the dust accumulates and it’s too much to bear?