The Zombie Apocalypse in Canada
So, would I survive the Zombiecalypse? No, most likely no. I have shot rifles and handguns while in South Africa. I like to do research and I’m not one of those blondes who runs into the street to see what’s going on. Having read all the Anita Blake books ever published I do know about the salt. And, like a friend of mine, I never wear heels so I can run in case of a zombie outbreak.
But I’m not exactly what you call fit and as a diabetic who’s dependant on insulin I could only get so far. I don’t watch zombie movies (well, I have seen Resident Evil, but that’s the only series), I have never seen an episode of Walking Dead or read a single zombie story (there’s just something about having things fall off).
But I won’t have to worry about any of that as the Canadian government has declared it is anti-zombie!
The full question and answer, courtesy of The Ottawa Citizen, is below because it’s completely awesome:
“I rise today to salute the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta and the province of Quebec for putting in place emergency measures to deal with the possibility of an invasion of zombies,” Martin said. “I do not need to tell you, Mr. Speaker, that zombies do not recognize borders and that a zombie invasion in the United States could easily turn into a continent wide pandemic if it is not contained.”
He continued: “On behalf of concerned Canadians everywhere, I want to ask the Minister of Foreign Affairs – is he working with his American counterparts to develop an international zombie strategy, so that a zombie invasion does not turn into a zombie apocalypse?
Foreign Affairs Minister John Baird replied: “I want to assure the member and all Canadians that I am dead-icated to ensuring that this never happens. I want to say categorically to this member and through him to all Canadians that under the leadership of this Prime Minister Canada will never become a safe haven for zombies, ever.”
So, as Canada will never be a safe haven for zombies I won’t have to worry about the Zombie Apocalypse…won’t I?
The article is from io9.
Posted on February 16, 2013, in Tina Christopher and tagged anti zombie, canadian government, dead-icated, harper, how to survive a zombie apocalypse, io9, martin, ottawa citizen, zombie apocalypse, zombies. Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.